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I don't wanna be loved, I don't wanna be loved.. I just want a quickie

photo: dangerouslee

You know that liberating feeling when you either break up with some scum bag or lose a really negative friend? That feeling where everything is either, really bright and cheerful, or just straight agony to the point where you can't even be bothered to comb your hair or even put on a decent foundation? That's pretty much how I'm feeling right now. I have been (with the exclusion of the past few weeks)a woman who was spoken for.

I thought all my life I had been pretty much a relationship girl and I'd be damned if I wasn't claimed! However, on light of recent events I've discovered that its really not. I'm more of a I want the perks of being in a relationship without any of the relation. Yeah I know I sound petty and awful but hear me out before you throw me in the pit.

I'm not against any relationship, should it come my way, however I'm through asking, questioning, or dwelling on that topic. I'm not going to sit around and act as if its something I want when quite frankly I'm over the whole idea of it. Its just become repetitive, like dating, but at least with dating its a new person so you may get an interesting story out of it.

It, at least for me, brings a calm over me, the peacefulness of a chill relationship. Someone who I can call when I need them and shoo them out when I'm done. I've always been a loner by nature, like I don't mind going out and being in large groups but I like me time. Not our time ME time.

I don't want to always be in constant contact with them, if I want to chill by myself I don't want to have to alert the masses and I don't want to check in or make sure that the other person will be OK with whatever I choose do or wear that day. I'm over it. I just need a quick fix and a laugh....maybe a cuddle session after but if I can't get comfortable with you in the bed then I want to be able to kick you out of it with out it being a big to do. But that's just me living my life how I see fit. Some may call it childish, I call it living.

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